The Journey Start here

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

So little time yet so much things to do. I really wonder how can i cope with every single things. No matter that, i shall not surrender when i've not fight fully in this battle. For I shall remain in silence and continue striving harder as it gets.

I've went through alot this past year. It taught me from the beginning and though I gave up at the end of the journey. I sat and ponder. It was really a painful journey for me, to listen, hear and keep it all to myself. When things like that happen, i was startled, amazed, dissapointed and lastly i felt clueless. From this sentence, people can make alot of judgement. Somehow, i feel that it is safer being in a smaller circle of friends. I know alot of them, i talk, laugh and joke around. One thing for sure, i did not share my thoughts, my feelings or whatever things that I see through my own opinion. Not that I choose not to, through experience, and security purposes, i think thats the best move. Tell me i am a coward, self-centered, judgemental and the list can just goes on. Have you ever thought of really being in my own shoes and think what i am thinking, decide what is needed at the moment of time. We work differently from others and that I should respect. Somehow I am always left unanswered, clueless or maybe its just me.

i begin to think and ponder to every single aspect.

i dont need an answer or symphaty from any readers.

because, my self-esteem is not even getting any better.
its like a nightmare, playing around in my dreams..

she told the story ... 18:38