here are the list to do till raya!! getting busy soon... hahahaha...

Friday
> clear my room

Saturday
> going to yishun take my new specs...yahoo!! (org raya kai contact lens aku kai specs haha)
> going sheng shiong to buy all bahan2 kuih whch left...
> making kuih the whole afternoon till the end of the day... hahaha...

Sunday
> clear off all the kuih muih session
> house spring cleaning...

Monday
getting all personal stuff such as
> new bag (handbag)
> new shoe
> if ders time search for baju raya or not forget it
> helping Dear to shop all his stuff like baju, samping, songkok, capal...haha Dear kene rabak dgn i kekeke...

Tuesday
> early morning trip to pasar geylang
> reach hm do all the unpacks (cnfrm granma buy lots off things)
> help out doint the cooking session (as im on leave)
> mlm kenduri
> and last trip to geylang wif Dear yahoo...
haha

so dats all the last min items have to be done as of TODAY!!

so NUR AQILAH BINTE MOHD AMIN.... jangan tak buat!! kau tu kdg ckp jer... haha make sure u do!! hahaha all the best...

menikmating saat2 terakhir bulan ramadhan....

Labels: things to clear off

was listening to RIA.. its fiza o show... about searching for long lost relative and askd for forgiveness...
it was sad when i was listening...
i wonder how i wish she would forgive her... whats her mistake?? 'her' also ur daughter... just becouse 'her husband is an ex-convict... samapi bila nak menghina dia?? bila kite dalam kesusahan die tolong kite abeh dia dalam kesusahan takde org tau tkde org amik peduli..
i feel like crying running away far to cry as loud as i can...
cant u forgive her??
nobody noes ive been contacting 'her' till now... let dem suspect about it...
only me noe how shes feeling rite now.. pity 'her' poor 'her' and 'she'??
i can feel 'she' is pilih kasih... have been living with her dis few yrs.. n now i noe wats the meaning of all dis...
"ku mohon maaf dari jauh" dats from 'her' to 'she'
kadang i really feel dat i really hate 'she' but shes been wif me for 19 yrs n i cant hate 'she' i just hoping 'she' realise everything... money dun give happiness.. y do 'she' really have to hate 'her'?? unless dat is not ur daughter... how about ur grandchildren?? argh!!
at times when i look into other family i really wish all my aunty's to gather and all of us are der but this??
now im saying everything from the bottom of my heart...
im mite not noe wat really happen but i can see since i was small till now u noe...
haiz...
IS EX CONVICT REALLY MEGHINA KAN??
but if u hate the ex convict but 'her' is still ur daughter....
im sorry...

Labels: sob sob

its lunch time!!! 1303hrs [but office watch is 1310hrs cepat kan]
[sorie im fasting ok!! haha]
browsing frindster pics and stuff and facebook...yar...
haha n now bored...
2 down 2 more to go...haha
dats my work load to go... haha can i finish by fri?? ouh yar mon i still have to come back half day...oh god!! nvm atleast dun have to stay the whole day rite2...
haha..
nothing much to type on as im quite bored now so do some typing...
last nite nothing much happen... reach home eat and waiting for Dear to msg but i fall asleep... den msg him dis morning and askd him y he didnt msg and found out he also fall asleep haha!!...

its been a long time ive read newspaper or watch news... so decided to take a peep at cyberita once reach office... and guess what the news dat me and Dear waiting for... KORBAN!! haha...
after reading automatically i msg Dear about the details
"HARGA kambing korban tahun ini ditetapkan $293 seekor, sama seperti tahun lalu..........
....... Tempahan kambing korban akan bermula pada 23 September dan ditutup pada 24 November 2008."
me and Dear decided to do some Korban dis year... 2ekor jer tak byk... haha
and decided 1ekor for fakir miskin and 1 ekor for us so have to divided by two..haha
yar we have thought to do some amal... and we start of wif the basic one [although it seems to be expensive but still can manage] haha
and yar im quite excited seh...
so looking forward on > early of november [ where we will 'tempah' the kambing(goat) ]
> 8 of dec [ where the korban happen hahaha ]

anybody want to join?? haha or want to fork out abit money?? its our pleasure to acept it.. the more money we receive insyaallah we 'tempah' extra kambing for the fakir miskin...

when come to think its feel like time fly fast... me and Dear are 9 mths 2 weeks... alhamdulilah our relationship last long... tanx Dear love u lots haha...
and the friendship ive been wif LiL Fren also like wah its countable haha...
the person dat i really appreciate most is LiL Fren and Dear yeah!! haha they are my supporter haha... so and pls dun break my heart yah... haha
ok2 before i start my nonsense better i go off now tc..haha

Labels: korban

Labels: Dear n friends

do i really feel like i want to raya or just forcing myself to make the suasana?? argh!!
haiz...
when i was listening to lagu raya, i feel shahdu n sayu.. n dunnoe wat was i thinking...
haiz.. i hope this year will be bermakna for me...
Dear tanx...

Labels: the feeling

its been long since my last post hahaha...
hey guys im back... truely back..wakakaka

Raya is around the corner!! Ouh man!! A single shit havent do..hahaha
Not to worry very much as im having a long leave [not dat long only the raya week haha]
Things to be done;
> tukar langsir - living room
- and my room!!
> kemas bilik [ my room is like a disaster ]
> kemas rumah [ will be done all the mops n sweaping mlm raya ]
> buat kuih [ as i havnt start a single one ]
> cari baju untuk Dear [ he think im his wife like i must get everything for him]
> and ouh yar getting my new shoe n bag...

So it quite still alot as im going to stay late for work dis week to clear all the bullshit haha... And dats y i only left Fri nite saturday sunday and Mon afternoon... As for tuesday i have to help out wif the cooking[ and dats for the reason y i mop n sweap my house malam raya]
hahaha...

and y must i in the working environment?? hahaha nmpk gaya dis yr tkda chance nak dpt duit raya grr... haha sebaliknyer im the one who must give duit raya..haha zakat.. but my zakat limit khehe...

so aqilah stop dreaming of getting duit raya kae..haha

so nothing much for dis week plan as getting all stuff work done...

dis is what i do for

SUNDAY = 21 SEPTEMBER 2008

nothing much was totally mabok at home[ perut masok angin] haha but was teaching tuition den teman ibu go sheng shiong buy all the making kuih stuff [ tapi blom buat ] hahaand iftar at nyai house...
as for Dear, he told me last min abt iftar at his friend house and i was like otw to my grandma house...yar... den he msg me wif a sad msg "everyone is here accept u"[all his friend n thier gerls was der] and i was like giggling haha whos fault not to tell me earlier and he was working wat n i dunnoe dat hes taking last min time off haha... so Dear next time as u noe NO last min kae..haha
after iftar ard 9pm otw home mit Dear n talk to him for awhile den...

SATURDAY = 20 SEPTEMBER 2008

yet my saturday somebody spoilt it...ders gone my sleeping... wake up at 9 go pasar come back clear neverything... as i was resting the rest of my sibling tgh kemas rumah cuci kipas lah lap tu lap nie haha and Siti feels geram dat i sit n bossy ard... tell her off lar pemalas... ive done alot of work haha..
still yet in afternoon nothing to do but was preparing and thinking what to cook [sambil gentel ondeh2] haha.. so yar dat day menu is roti john cheese, ayam masak lemak cili padi, and mee siam goreng... oso yar ondeh2 haha...
as usual my weekend after maghrib read al Qur'an till isyak n had isyak prayers along...

FRIDAY = 19 SEPTEMBER 2008

was at werk n clearing all jobs but den still boring but no time to touch dis blog..haha
after werk 6 pm n luckily dis designer of mine so kind n let me off at 6...
i was doing some copy n paste in the drawing and almost done he was standing beside me, "eh aqilah its 6 pm aready go off, go off..." i was gigling n telling him to be patient n not to worry haha..
atleast let me finish my pasting haha
rush down to paya lebar meet dear n have a light buka as we going to Wak Jor house to fill our stomach with more food haha... our intention was to get the baju raya but in the end didnt buy because i didnt found the one dat i like haha... so walk2 we buy lots of food in the end hahaha...
den we head back home to wak jor house...
in the end didnt buy any baju hahaha...
cool man...

1321hrs its lunch time now...
n im doing nothing and i dunnoe what am i thinking haha...
alots and alots...
>friends
>relationship
>family

argh!!! work at time make me lost all dis thinking... ppl say work is stress for me at time it let me forget everything...

syawal is ahead...i got dis feeling...
i want to listen to raya song i want i want.. but i feel very sayu n shahdu...
i feel very sad n feel lke crying... am i being to emo?? hurmph...

aqilah you have change n i dunnoe weather others notice anot...usually dis time u r the cheerful people on the earth but whats wrong with you!!!

i dunnoe!! i think i need a counselling... argh!! as u noe ive been thinking all above...

>friends;
what is your defination of friendship...
i just like to create dis poem...
Thanks for being there for me,
through good times and bad times.
I will be on your side even if the the world ends.
When the world is going,
I will be here,
now and until the end.
Your my very best friend.
The one that I look up to.
The one that I run to, when I have a problem.
The one that I talk to.
Your the one best friend that was always there for me.
I wanna thank you for all the things you gave and showed me.

Lil Fren im sorry... i need a time off but i dunnoe y i feel like let u to contact me back... i just hate it... at times i wonder y must i keep cntct ppl... do they like it?? am i forcing u to tok to me??
Lil Fren im lost now...
let the times ans everything...

>relationship;
how to start... ive been seeing abbie smiling lately... and he really happy noe after we have a good talk and decision...
but abbie didnt see the sorrow in me as u noe ive been keep smiling and stay happy infront of people only here u may noe all the black and white of me...

yest had our dinner (buka) with him... specially went to breeks and eat.. haha kaya!kaya! haha
he order half bbq chicken and it was very2 nice n i eat fish dory spicy speghatti and its quite nice...yummy!!
he make my days yest and make me forget abt my probs for awhile...

just cant wait to go shopping with him...

this is what he want...
> listening to him (i dun think so as hes not my officially husband but to certain extend i will)
> stop talking abt my frens ( but then what am i going to do?? we did make a promise before i agree to be ur Girlfriend)

although yar like i dun think im doing dat but im happy with him...
but i hope he change his way...
Feelings that once were hidden
Are now expressed to you.
Days that once were stormy
Are now the brightest blue.

Times that once were lonely
Are now filled with pleasure.
All that once was mine alone
Are now things we both treasure.

Nights that once were cold
Are now comforting and warm.
Fears that once were very real
Are now gone with the storm.

abbie.. u are too stubborn but i hope evrything will be fine...
appreciate...

>Family;
this is the difficult part..i dunnoe n im wondering... argh!!
y? n y?
i dun think my family shatterd but i dun see any happiness...i want the old times...
y people surround us masuk campur??
better u make ur decision wisely dad...

just want to confess dis in end november 2007, my dad was retrenched... and dat time i was preparing for my exams i dunnoe till my mom confess to me when my utilities at home have been cut off... ive cried n did run away... dats my mom first fear...
i really2 sad...all my dreams shatterd to cont study and everything only god noe how i felt and ppl mite say it in easy way but not my family...
since den he started a business with me n my mom support... he open a stall in a school selling chicken rice... and also he werk part time at shell...
and now my father side have been like discourage him abt his business... they should give him a support instead..but?? argh!! what are u guys trying to do..

my family is like an endless story... i heard my mom say this " bila kite nak hidup macam biase balik" to tell the truth my dad use to have alot of "hutang" yar... haiz and slowly im like and all of us helping hin to clear...
i noe nobody is perfect in this world...
i hope one day i pray for the happiness will come true... insyaallah amin....

Our family is the proverbial egg that we were hatched from. Everything about us. both nature and nurture comes from this place. Our family is everything. Sometimes we choose to run away from our roots because they are too painful to face. Ultimately however, if we do not face where we came from, we will have difficulty understanding our present and future.

P.S: if you think ive change come forward and tell me..im happy you approach me...

aqilah i hope you dun think much u just need to relex..although this have happen all this while... to aqilah Lil Fren she really need you just dat she cant face you now... to aqilah boyfie aksd her problem n do care about her dun sit der although u see her happy... to aqilah family insyaallah happiness will be der just abit more to go n all those effort will paid off bak patah berkata... biar susah dulu senang kemudian... insyaallah... amin...

Labels: the feeling

hey hey hey...haha..
im quite tired but still can manage myself.. haha
just came back from outside dat is buka with the old frens 'the climbers' haha
> firstly, we mit ard 5... den we decide where to eat in the end we choose geylang
> we reach geylang around 6.30 n cant find a place to eat n decided to buy food at the bazaar n sit somewhere n eat khehe but it was fun lar n ofcos
the peeps are AQILAH AFIQ(CICAK) AISHAH DAENG DINIE RENA N the last one to join is WAK







we walk around geylang n see2 khehe
one thing i was afraid is my guy gang was der haha i dunnoe why im that afraid mite b im close wif cicak n wak n dats why..haha
in the end we end up at kampong melayu coz wak wanna go toilet... *urgent* hahaha
how we end up der coz... we took pics haha.. yar all the pics..standard sume suke amik gambar haha

something disturb my mind suddenly
and since den it disturb me till now
im wondering n keep wondering
i dunnoe how to explain but i have to let it out

Firstly,
i dunnoe n im still quite surprise she told me something dat one fine afternoon... n till now i keep thinking since i saw something.. i need an explanation from her.. is it bcoz of him or what r u trying to do... if u want to make me stop thinking pls tell me th whle story i want to noe...
n im sorie dats why im keeping away from you.. let me be alon euntill u want to make things clear... what is all the whole journey means... argh!!!! i noe u are not that type but grrr.... im sorie lil fren...
im totally feel trouble u noe.. i just cant understand it... and dats why in im trying to run away from all of you!!
argh!!!!!! dats seems to bother me much i think.. why n why

not onli u lil fren my wity fren oso...why everybody dat is close to me like dat??
asal org berubah dengan sekelip mata....

yar at times commen sense what my guy told me
"fren come n go (i hope t does not happen)
but not love ones ( is it true??)
cherish your family and i will be ur side forever"

she really feeling trouble with her lil fren.. will her lil fren going to tell her what is the whole story or she will disappear from her lil fren??
she have been trying to avoid alot of people... have she change.. some people say friends are important n some say relationship is important...which is which?? she really cant decide but what can be see shes slowly trying to pull herself out..out from everybody... not to create attention but she wanna be alone.. and she really want to be with her family..yes family is important... i should cherish n treasure them...

Labels: lilltle confuse

Labels: aLL in heR LiL hearT